This is real. Well, a real patent, anyway. There is no proof that Mr., Mrs., or perhaps Miss P. Marchio ever manufactured this tool that sucks out the insides out of a banana then fills that hollow space with ice cream. But sincerely I hope it was made. I also hope to receive one as a gift at my bridal shower. That is, if I ever have a bridal shower. Or perhaps I'll just die unloved, single, and penniless in an alley in Rego Park Queens. Maybe I'll adopt all the neighborhood stray cats and give them names that start with J - Julie, Jennifer, Jingle Jangle, Jesus, Jewanda, Jermagesty, Joint. Maybe I'll teach them all to ski and how to wait patiently in line at the Rego Park mental free clinic. Wait, what was the point of this entry? Oh, yes, the Banana Ice Cream Injector. Clever, clever, clever indeed!