Sunday, August 23, 2009

Two Kiwis

I love Flight of the Conchords, the folk-comic music duo from New Zealand.  So do lots of people so that's not odd.  What is odd is how much they apparently love me.  I'm like, "Bret, Jemaine, stop trying to get my attention - I'm in a committed relationship!" But their love for me continues even though I do nothing to provoke it.

Don't believe me?  Here's the facts:

  • There is a character in the show called Murray.  Not the most common name, is it?  You know who else is called Murray?  My boyfriend, that's who!  It's like their trying to see where my allegiances lie, their Murray or mine.  When the TV is on, I've looked them square in the eye and told them, "My, Murray.  Mine!" It's like their desperate or something.
  • I live in Brooklyn near the Williamsburg Bridge.  Not only did they put the bridge in the opening credits of season 2, they shot a whole scene the library near my apartment.  Coincidence?  I freaking doubt it.
  • And finally, perhaps you will recall the number "Inner City Pressure," a musical sequence in season 1 shot near an elevated train.  Was it the F train at Smith and 9th?  The 7 up Roosevelt Ave?   No, no, a thousand times no!  It was shot at the JMZ which is the train I take every blessed day.  And the stop they're at is Marcy, which is my stop.  Well, it's my stop if the J is going express.  If it's going local then my stop is Hewes, but I refused to get bogged down in the details.  It's all right there plain as day: they adore me.

Well, I don't want to lead them on or anything, so perhaps this is dangerous.  But since they've done so much for the borough of Brooklyn, I felt it only right that I honor Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement with a few Kiwi recipes.

Kiwi Ginger Lime Pops
1 c water
3/4 c sugar
1 tbs fresh ginger, grated
1 tsp grated lime zest
5 kiwis
1/2 c lime juice
1 egg white
  • Heat water, sugar, and lime zest until sugar dissolves.  Let cool to room temperature.
  • Strain the syrup over a sieve into a bowl
  • Puree kiwis with lime juice then combine with egg white and syrup
  • Freeze 
Because Jemaine is part European and part Maori, I thought it might be more representational if these pops were mixed.  I, too, am mixed race and I insist on cultural sensitivity at all times.

Cantaloupe Pops
1/2 c water
1/2 c sugar
1 small cantaloupe, seeded and pureed
1/4 c lemon juice
  • Heat water and sugar until sugar dissolves.  Let cool to room temperature.
  • In a blender, puree cantaloupe and lemon juice.  Set aside.
  • Combine syrup with cantaloup mixture.  
  • Freeze and share with Jemaine on your fire escape

Kiwi Sorbet
1 c water
3/4 cup super fine (caster) sugar
1 1/2 lbs kiwis

  • Peel and chop kiwis.  Blend in a blender until smooth
  • Add sugar and water
  • Let chill at least one hour
  • Freeze with your trusty ice cream maker as per manufacturer's instuctions
  • Spoon feed to Bret as you wait in line at the post office

I love you, Murray!

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